START HERE: What it Means to Be a Rock
START HERE: What it Means to Be a Rock
You rock, rock.
There’s a scene in the maximalist Oscar-winning 2022 film “Everything Everywhere All at Once” that takes my breath away. Amid a barrage of non-stop action, humor, and existential and family crises, the characters’ journey through infinite universes takes them to a nearly silent rock world, a place where the conditions weren't right for life to form.
The sensory cacophony that is the rest of the film briefly stops during the two-minute scene, where the characters’ rock versions of themselves overlook a beautiful canyon and speak silently through words on the screen. The main character, middle-aged Chinese immigrant and mother Evelyn, tries to use the moment to apologize to her daughter, Joy, and mend their fraught relationship, but Joy stops her, saying:
“Shhhh. You don't have to worry about that here. Just be a rock.”
That scene made me think of another—the NSFW opening scene from the existential comedy “I Heart Huckabees.” In an anxious, profanity-laden internal monologue, environmental activist Albert Markovski, played by Jason Schwartzman, wonders if his advocacy will lead to any meaningful change. While it comes from a place of cynical angst, the poem that he reads aloud to celebrate the protection of a small boulder replays often in my mind for its brilliant, zen-like simplicity:
“Nobody sits like this rock sits.
You rock, rock.
The rock just sits and is.
You show us how to just sit here,
and that’s what we need.”
What is a Rock, Really?
According to the Encyclopedia Britannica, a rock is a “naturally occurring and coherent aggregate of one or more minerals. Such aggregates constitute the basic unit of which the solid Earth is composed…” The non-living pieces of minerals that we mindlessly kick around, pick up and examine, or ignore most of our lives come from the mantle and crust of the planet we live on, and many have been around for more than four billion years. I’m not a geologist, but if you think about it in the most basic terms, without rocks we might still be small amphibious creatures living in the open ocean. Rocks could have literally formed the basis for our existence. It’s a rock fact!
What Are You Talking About?
I’m glad you asked! If you’re someone who knows me well, you might be rolling your eyes or chuckling to yourself because you have probably witnessed my lifelong love of rocks and minerals first-hand. This discussion is my way of exploring why I’m calling this newsletter “Be the Rock.”
To me, being “rock-like” is a state of mind. In the rare occasions when I can actually sit down and meditate without overthinking it or running through my mental to-do list, I occasionally feel like a blank slate, where my “human-ness” starts to flicker for a moment or two. It’s similar to when I’m exploring a beautiful place in nature or get lost in a book. For a blissful minute or two, I can stop ruminating about all the things I need to do later, or what someone thinks of me, or whatever general sense of unease is creeping in from the back of my mind at the time.
I find rocks to be peaceful, grounding, and inspiring. Rocks are neutral and non-judgmental. As far as we know, they don’t have aspirations, and they don’t ascribe to a life calling or a higher power. They just are. The rock just sits and is.
So This is Just About Rocks?
No—as I mentioned above, I wish I had the scientific knowledge to back up my interests, but I intend to use my relationship with rocks and nature as a metaphor for balanced living. After three decades of living on this big rock of ours, I have developed an urge to seek, or perhaps flow into, a relaxed, balanced, content state of being. Not a perfect life, but a good enough one where I can actively move away from inner turmoil and towards a state of quiet contentment.
Think of this blog as a living, breathing journal, and I am letting you peer over my shoulder while I write it. I intend it to be free-flowing on topics that interest me. The format of these pieces will likely be like this one—think a less angry version of “Last Week Tonight” with John Oliver—thoughts and discussions on mindfulness, wellness and positive psychology, self acceptance and advocacy, navigating the American healthcare system, and tips on finding small moments of serenity in our hectic, hyper-capitalist, striving modern existence.
This blog will include personal essays and experiences, my own strange sense of humor, references to other art forms and pop-culture, and expert citations as needed, especially if I am discussing something health-related, to which I have no formal credentials.
NOTE: Many of the hyperlinks embedded in my pieces lead to YouTube videos, which might include advertisements and related content that I cannot control. Proceed with caution!
Why Should I Read Your Blog?
If you’re a friend or family member—welcome! Hopefully this is readable and you will find something useful. If you stumbled across this from elsewhere on the internet, you are also more than welcome. Just know that this is a stream-of-conscious work-in-progress that will not be as polished as other think-pieces, personal essays, articles, or online rants that you may have come across, especially within the crowded wellness space.
What are some reasons to join me? Maybe you’re a curious daydreaming over-thinker like me, and sometimes you feel overwhelmed by the demands of modern living. Maybe you’ve given up on social media, but you still yearn for a safe and nurturing online forum (cough that’s not Reddit, cough) to explore ideas about what it means to be a somewhat well-adjusted human adult in an increasingly complex modern world. Maybe you were the “weird one” in middle or high school and never quite outgrew the feeling that you might be different from your peers.
I can only speak from my own experience as a white, neurodivergent, cisgendered, thirty-something female-identifying person with chronic health conditions and some inherited privilege, but I think it’s still a perspective worth sharing. I will also strive to be as inclusive as possible with suggestions for self-advocacy, especially for readers who do not have access to health insurance or come from an environment where they do not feel supported in their efforts to improve their health, happiness, and well-being. And if this doesn’t sound like your cup of tea, don’t feel any pressure to read it. I won’t be offended! As comedian Maria Bamford has said of her stand-up material:
“I could bomb, or nobody’s there, and I could care less. I find it creatively satisfying to write material and say it out loud in a public place, whether or not anyone’s listening.”
If you’re still here after reading all this, grab a rock, take a seat, and buckle up. This will be a long long long journey (as I used to tell my friends growing up, “My train of thought has never left the station,”) but it just might be worth the read.